I love playing! This year I have played more and more and it seems like that is all I am doing most of the time. Each time I remind myself that “Play” is the word I choose to represent my life this year, and that I shouldn’t be feeling guilty, before I know it another opportunity to play arrives in my inbox, as a text on my cell phone or as a call from a client or friend to spend more time on the playground!
I have been astounded at the fact that every time I let go of little feelings of guilt at how much playing I am doing, in a very short space of time I find myself in the middle of another playtime.
The biggest lesson I have had this year of playing so far, has been that it’s entirely possible to play and work at the same time and the more I ease into life and have fun, the more fun finds me.
I cringe when I remember how much I struggled through life for years trying and striving to improve, enhance and survive. Now I seem to cruise and flow and simply show up and everything I need continues to just be there.
Simplifying my life may have something to do with this. A few years ago, I had to endure what I now know was self-inflicted “suffering.” With very little money, on the brink of losing everything (at that stage I had already lost a lot), I wondered if it wouldn’t have been easier to not be around. Thinking about it now doesn’t shock me anymore. I was looking at life through the lens of ‘not enough’ rather than being grateful for what I had and that is the cause of suffering.
Of course, I am not denying that there are so many who really do suffer in the world. Those that are at the mercy of unconscious beings, unaware of what they are doing. That is a conversation for another day.
I am really referring to those who simply cannot see past the apparent imperfections towards the beauty of life. I was there – I felt I was suffering because I didn’t have what I thought I should have, based on the standards set for me, by a mostly unconscious world. I wanted bigger, better, more….
It was only when I stood on the brink of losing myself in the process of my suffering that I was able to make the decision to start appreciating what little I had. That’s the shift in energy that started the creation of more to be appreciative of.
Some time has passed since then and I can truly say that I am so appreciative of the struggle because I now see how ungrateful I had become of so much in my life. Being in a state of appreciation creates more situations to appreciate and that is the start of an abundant life.
In fact I like to call it an ABANDANCE because I feel like I am dancing through life almost with abandonment – not worrying or being anxious a lot of the time, which is exactly the opposite of how I used to be, a ball of anxiety about everything. Experiencing true freedom means being in a constant state of gratitude, and that keeps one in a constant state of receivership.
Where are you focusing your energy? Are you able to see through all the little imperfections through to the beauty? Can you shift, even a little bit towards gratitude for what you do have rather than focus on what you do not have?
I invite you to experience ABANDANCE!